I will never forget the midwife coming to my apartment and saying, “They found something.” I had cheerfully let her in, NOT expecting her to say that. And life went on after that..appointment after appointment. Praying and watching tumors on my baby’s heart, hoping they wouldn’t grow and obstruct pathways to life.

Baby was born with cardiac tumors and growths on his brain. The condition is called Tuberous Sclerosis Complex. He has been having seizures everyday within the last month, and some prior to then. They are not your typical seizure or the kind you think of when you hear the word. He side-smirks like a pirate while cooing. I thought that was his signature look and was so excited to catch on video, even!

My son started having events more often and I became suspicious. I put my “nurse cap” on from time to time and knew something “neuro” was going on. Now he has them about seven times a day with a new medication added on. I am finally happy that my husband talks about what it does to him on the inside. Why he couldn’t rub my belly or feel excitement for our little bundle. Maybe that’s why we were arguing more? Why I felt such a disconnect during a traumatic pregnancy. You are never truly prepared to feel pregnant or alone, never mind both.

I will say, my faith continues to grow more and more. Our baby has given us grounding on this earth. My children in general do that to us. Their Christ likeness is inevitable. We are reminded that all we do is for Him. Every life given is by Him and we are to deliver with love and patience. Boy, do my boys love to test my patience, haha!

Below are some plants my family and I have kept alive. I love planting and attempting to grow food. We combined watermelons and peppers below. There are also carrots and basil. Cheers to life!